Really Really Really Really Stressed

A sample of my thoughts lately:

"...I really need to stop wasting time and go research stuff for the debate thingy 'cause that's just in a couple weeks, and if I don't get this speech done in time I'm going to be so embarrassed, and I have to schedule my makeup piano lesson before it's too late, and I really need to research my debate papers because I have no clue what I'm supposed to do otherwise, and I really didn't need to eat that cookie...or that ice cream cone...and I kinda feel blah, and I need to exercise but I can't because I think I damaged a muscle in my oblique and if I strain it I'll really injure myself, but I really have to get the debate stuff done but..."

Yes, that is what the inside of my brain looks like. Let me unpack this and pour it into a sympathetic ear.

Number 1. You may have noticed that the word 'debate' popped up several times in my jumbled thoughts. In a couple weeks...scratch that... in about a week and a half...I'm going to participate in a Communicators for Christ conference. I have some homework, and most of it's easy. An interp, a current event...stuff like that. Well, there's one part that really has me stressed, and that is the debate homework. I need to find four source articles over all, and so far I've found a grand total of one. 1. Uno. I am the kind of person that stresses and stresses and stresses (as you may have guessed). In fact, I'm stressing so much that I'm restraining my muscle, which leads me to...

Number 2. I strained a muscle in my oblique, I think. (the oblique is basically my core) I would not know that terminology unless two prominent baseball players on my favorite baseball team damaged theirs. It took a pretty long while for one to return back to the game, and the other is looking for surgery. As you can see, I really don't want to damage my poor oblique by any exercise, but now I'm getting into...

Number 3. I was recently on vacation. At my grandparents house. Where I ate junk food for a solid week. And I am desperately in need of exercise. But, because of my above oblique, I can't run. I can't do crunches. I haven't tried lifting weights yet. All I can do is sit around the house. It's really getting to me because, for a little while, I was actually pretty happy with my appearance. Something like this has happened before, and it took me about a year to work back to where I started from. It really drives me nuts. Thankfully, I've become a bit older and wiser over the last year or so, so it doesn't absolutely devastate me. But of course all the rest of my friends are pretty slim, and I have never considered myself slim. If I don't dwell on it, it doesn't bother me, but when I do I'm miserable. That is why I am moving on.

You know, it feels really good to dump myself out like this once in a while. If you've stuck with this kind of whiny post up to these words, thanks for reading. Lots of hugs. =)

Izori